The Streets: English rugby

Hey England, you're shit, you're shit and my gosh don't you just know it.

Ireland 19 -13 England.
Engerland for the wooden spoon, way ooh!!

See you in Cardiff Wales, you're going down :p

Limericks of the affluent

There once was a boy from D4
And the knackers he did abhor
So he got out his gun
And killed them for fun
So they couldnt annoy him anymore.

Stalker stake-out.

That little guy in me called modesty told me not to post this but he's small so I don't listen to him much. In fact, I think he gets bullied by confidence and ego. Serves him right for not sticking up for himself.
Anywho, I digress, I think I have myself a bonified stalked, well had mostly. Not in a watches him from the bushes kind of stalker but a follows me around and wont FUCKING LEAVE ME ALONE. My God, she clearly knows I don't like her, I can't stand her. This isn't a physical thing all you women will be glad to hear, she is a repulsive blubbering digusting mess of a personality which is overweight and wears revealing clothes (the personality not her, although she does like her revealing clothes). Why do I not like her? She is hypocrite, a liar, clingy, needy, has low self-esteem and takes advantage of drunk guys. But the worse thing about her is she is so freaking creepy, her voice, eyes and...*shudder*. Its just not nice to be stuck near her especially when shes been drinking.
The other day in a nightclub I was walking around, saw her ahead of me and quickly turned around. Two seconds later I feel her tugging on my arm trying to start a conversation...AGH.
There are many other tales, quite worse but I'd rather not give away too much for anonyminites sake, everyone needs a back-up plan after all.

So from now on I'm going to spare her feelings and try and ditch the civility ( I felt sorry for her).
Her: 'why haven't I been talking to you in a while?'
Me: 'I've been avoiding you'
Her: ' oh my god..why?'
Me: 'I don't like you'

I think at this stage she has to change her ways and needs a reason to. Although I've been holding back because an ex told me she had been all depressed because she had no friends at the start of last summer. Waaaah.

First post Farce

Well silly me, I forget to welcome everyone to my fabolous, contrabolous, judgenabolous new blog. Don't know how long it will last but sure, theres only one way to find out. Appreciate any comments.
Unfortunately my student status means I can't afford a boards.ie one.

C'est la vie.
Or as the Americans say, thats freedom.

Metabolisms.

You know what bugs me, among many things? Is women who claim to have 'crappy metabolisms', which is of course the source of their chubby thighs and beer bellies. Science has thankfully proven, that it has nothing to do with all that chocolate they gorge on or all that alcohol they jug or the fact that they never, ever walk anywhere. Nope. It is most definetely their 'crappy metabolism'
What is a crappy metabolism anyway? Judging by the way these women talk it is probably a slow one which means they burn off less calories so you have to eat less food.
Well Holy Bejaysus, now here was me thinking that nature, evolution or God had intended it that way. No, in fact I'm positive that is a good metabolism. Life saving even. In the days of yesteryear, these robust women would have been feeeding off the carcass' of those with supermodel metabolisms during a famine.
Well, thats women for you. Oh course, if I was to ever correct said women on their choice of words I would obviously be labelled a caring, insensitive bastard. When in fact the opposite is true, I love their big asses and hips. It means they'll be able to bear my children while I hunt and fornicate with my supermodel metabolism women (who have no real emotional connection with me through children and so are not actually happy with a life of glamour and sex).

You know what, on second thought I'll marry the thin girl.
We can always adopt.